My Wedding Day Hot Takes (That Might Save You Money)

1. Photographers don't need an hour for detail shots

I think wedding photographers spend too much time photographing details.

Don't get me wrong, the details matter! A beautiful photo (or five, tops!)of your invitation suite, rings, bouquet, shoes and other carefully chosen items helps set the scene for your wedding gallery and album. They provide context and tell part of the story but I don't think they deserve a huge slice of your wedding day.

The dress is the biggest example. Every photograph of you throughout the day will feature the dress. Every hug, every dance, every tear, every portrait. Why spend precious time hanging it from a chandelier, a tree branch, or the back of a door when it's about to become the star of hundreds of photographs anyway?

The same goes for rings. You'll hopefully be wearing them for the rest of your life. You can admire them anytime you'd like. I don't think they need to be balanced precariously on a flower petal to gain more meaning. But hey, that's just me.

2. Invite fewer people

I know this one can be difficult because it might mean stepping on some toes. Family expectations are real. Social obligations are real. But if there's one piece of advice I consistently give couples, it's this: don't be afraid to keep your guest list smaller than people expect.

Your wedding is one of the only events in your adult life that is specifically about celebrating you and your partner. Yet so many couples spend the entire day bouncing between conversations with distant relatives, small talk with coworkers and friends they haven't seen in years.

A smaller guest list means more meaningful interactions, less stress, and more time spent with the people who actively participate in your life and are the closest witnesses to your love story. And yes, this includes child-free weddings but I feel so strongly about this particular topic, it might just need it's own post.

3. Invest less in the temporary and more in the permanent

When planning a wedding, it's easy to get caught up in the details because it's most likely the one day in your life that you will spend the most time planning for. Your birthdays, your graduation days, your anniversaries - those days are important but you haven't considered buying silk pajama sets for you and your six best friends, plus special champagne flutes adorned with gold cursive writing, plus flowers that match your ribbons and the font on your specially ordered napkins. The list could go on forever!

These things enhance the moment but disappear as soon as the day ends.

Flowers wilt, dinner gets eaten, wedding favors often get forgotten, and the custom light-up foam sticks for the dance floor were fun for thirty minutes and then they're tossed by the event staff after your exit.

As you consider what your big day will look like, also consider what the years after will look like. You'll have your ring, you'll have your dress to pass down to your daughter, you'll have your photos and videos to enjoy for years to come. Everything else should be secondary.

4. You should still look like yourself!

The particular type of anxiety that hits people on their wedding day is unlike any other. Everyone, and I mean everyone, is there for you, and they got all dressed up for the occasion. They're going to be looking at you nonstop. In fact, you're going to be up in front of a crowd professing your deepest love for your partner for fifteen minutes straight and then they're going to clap as your seal the deal!

The pressure to look your best is inescapable. You want clear skin, perfect hair, a pristine dress and you want it to all look effortless and natural.

Why then do so many people push themselves right out of their comfort zones and right onto the red carpet?

If you never wear false eyelashes, your wedding day probably isn't the ideal time to start. If you wear glasses daily, don't feel pressured to try contacts for your big day. If you typically wear minimal makeup, don't go full glam because you absolutely deserve to look incredible, but it's equally as important that you feel comfortable and confident.

When you look back at your photographs twenty years from now, you should see yourself.

5. Remember that Getting Ready coverage is optional

This one usually surprises people. As a photographer, I'm always happy to be a part of the "getting ready" portion of the day. Some couples love those images, and they absolutely have value.

But if we're being honest? They're rarely the photographs people treasure most.

"Getting ready" photos are often among the most directed images of the day. The buttoning of the dress gets recreated. The makeup artist pauses. The bride looks out the window on cue. The groom adjusts his watch.

Again, none of this is bad. These photos serve a similar purpose to detail photos. They help establish the story and they set the scene.

But when couples look back at their wedding galleries years later, the images that make them laugh, cry, and relive the day are almost always the real moments that happen later: the ceremony, the hugs from family, the speeches, the dance floor, the fleeting interactions they didn't even realize happened.

I'm not saying entirely skip this coverage, but I am encouraging you to find a photographer who is happy to be flexible with the timeline. You are the client, we are there to serve you and ultimately we are there to bring your vision to life.

At the end of the day...

My advice for you is to prioritize the things that help you experience your wedding day, not just perform it.

The best weddings aren't the ones with the most details, the biggest guest lists, or the trendiest ideas. They're the ones where couples are fully present, surrounded by people they love, feeling like themselves, and creating memories they'll genuinely want to revisit for the rest of their lives.

Everything else is just decoration.